Qpid
An intergalactic love triangle set in 12th century England with added Q - what could possibly go wrong...?
The Captain is giving the opening address at an archaeology symposium, but don’t worry, that's not what the episode is about… it's just a paper-thin excuse to bring back Vash. She throws the cat among the pigeons when Doctor Crusher finds her in Picard’s quarters when arriving for her morning gossip with the Captain. Vash proceeds to be paraded around the ship to embarrass the usually unshakeable Picard. Everyone’s surprised that Vash was never mentioned, but then “the Captain is a very private man.” But this is all just foreplay. Because look who’s waiting in the Captain’s Ready Room? Why, it’s Q... as was made obvious by the episode title. So on a flimsy premise, Q whisks the bridge crew and Vash off to 12th century Sherwood Forest for one of his little games. There follows a swashbuckling romp as Picard and his merry men try to rescue Vash from Nottingham castle. Bring popcorn.
Words
The idea for a love triangle between Picard, Vash, and Q was a pitch from Randee Russell, and for some reason Michael Piller gave this concept to Ira Steven Behr to develop. This was surprising, as Behr had left the show at the end of season three, and nobody seems to have any idea why Piller would go outside for this one - other than the fact that Piller liked Behr’s script for “Captain’s Holiday” and felt he was the best writer for the job. During the meetings where they tried to ‘break’ the story, the suggestion was made to throw the characters into a classic love story. Behr initially proposed Camelot, but then had another idea: why not capitalise on the popularity of Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (which was riding high in the box office at the time) and go to Sherwood forest...?
Behr was less inspired by the 1991 movie, however, than by its forerunner from half a century before - the classic 1938 Errol Flynn movie The Adventures of Robin Hood.
This film casts a long shadow over the Robin Hood mythos, and if you haven’t seen it (and have a taste for old movies), you really ought to check it out. Neither is this the only homage in the screenplay. Remember when Worf smashes LaForge’s mandolin? That was in tribute to a famous scene in National Lampoon's Animal House.
It’s clear Behr had a lot of fun writing this one.
Acting Roles
“Sir, I protest - I am not a merry man!”
This episode was shot in the week of Valentine’s Day 1991 - indeed, the call sheets for Thursday wished the cast “Happy Valentine’s Day” (a message added by producer Merri Howard). It seems that everyone was having fun with this one, at least until Jonathan Frakes was injured in the eye when his quarterstaff was struck rather too sharply by a sword. Frakes had to be whisked off to hospital (still in full merry men garb) by Howard, who it seems was a busy bee during the week of filming.
Obviously the episode is dominated by the two returning guest stars, Jennifer Hetrick as Vash and John de Lancie as Q, both of whom have fun leaning into their carefully dug ruts, and are perfectly enjoyable together or one-at-a-time.
Vash adds more value, as putting her amongst the unsuspecting Enterprise crew is one of the strongest aspects of the story, whereas with Q this feels like a step backwards to season one Q with his silly-slash-deadly games. After the brilliance of “Déjà Q”, this feels a rather pedestrian Q vehicle, but hey, John de Lancie’s Q is always good fun whatever the story.
The show got letters complaining that the women weren't allowed to sword fight, to which director Cliff Bole remained adamant that “we went back to the 12th century and we were doing the 12th century, and I can’t change history.” However, what really makes this decision bizarre is that Marina Sirtis and Gates McFadden are the only members of the cast other than Patrick Stewart who can actually fight with swords! As McFadden later remarked:
Marina and I have always laughed about the fact that both of us can do fencing and that sort of thing. We’re the ones who bash pots over warrior’s heads, instead of doing karate or whatever.
There are some new guest stars here worth remarking upon, most especially Clive Revill as Guy of Gisbourne.
Don’t recognise Revill…? He is the poor unfortunate who was cast as the voice of the Emperor in The Empire Strikes Back, and then was cruelling excised from the Star Wars saga by George Lucas’ revisionistic reworking of the movie for its digitally-impaired re-release.
This was not Revill’s only stint with Robin Hood either, since in his early career he had a small roll in the 1957 TV series The Adventures of Robin Hood, not to mention he was in Robin Hood: Men in Tights as a fire marshal.
Oh, and Michael Dorn’s Worf is victorious in battle this week, but only against 12th century militia, which doesn’t count as an alien. Are there enough episodes left for him to finish with a winning season…? I’m really not sure at this point (the aliens have twice his points right now). But you know our Klingon security chief - he’ll go down fighting!
Models, Make-up, and Mattes
The location shooting happened in Sherwood Forest... only kidding! Like Paramount was going to fly everyone to England for a single episode. No, they drove across Los Angeles to the suburb of Glendale for a one day shoot in Descanso Gardens. Here’s Michael Dorn and LeVar Burton rehearsing the mandolin smash together.
I’m not a fan of the fortress set, which looks exactly like what it is: a set. But clearly you can’t get beyond that cardboard castle feeling without actually going to Europe and filming in an authentic castle, which obviously would have wildly overshot the budget.
It’s the wardrobe department that has most to offer from the technical teams this week, with a variety of medieval garments so that everyone can play dress up. Take a look!
All in all, this episode never quite fires on all cylinders, and despite seeming to have dynamite in the idea of combining Vash and Q in one story, it somewhat fizzles. To be fair, it does come entirely out of left field, and for Michael Piller this was one of the strengths of this season:
It just seemed to be that Robin Hood and his band of merry men was a very nice group to put our guys into, and then we just played it for fun. That was what was so great about the fourth season and wasn’t so great about the fifth season. Each week you were never quite sure what was going to come on.
Why was the fifth season less varied? Well hold on, we’ll get there. For now, enjoy the anarchic directions that the fourth season indulges in, even when they don’t quite work out as planned.
I thought this was good fun. It's always great when the cast is obviously having a blast. Making Piccard sweat was hilarious and you just can't go wrong with Q.